By the age of two, it started to become clear that something wasn't quite right with this little sailor. As his ear infections worsened, his doctor put him on an adult dose of medicine. My concerned mom told the doc she felt like she was locking him in a closet every time she gave him the meds - Feffs was starting to lose his language, was less apt to make eye-contact, and his bubbly spirit was diminishing. The doctor basically told my mom she was being a stupid, worrisome mother. 

This brusque dismissal brings to mind a popular (and horrendous) theory from the fifties called the Refrigerator Mother Theory. "Experts" laid the blame for a child's autism on a lack of maternal warmth. (I can assure you, my sweet and loving mom was/is in no way, shape, or form lacking in warmth.) ♥️♥️♥️ 

Eventually she got up the courage to change docs. The new one couldn't believe how many drugs had been pumped into this tiny guy's system and traded out the meds for ear tubes. 

Still, the digression in social interaction and communication persisted. Not much was known about the autism spectrum at the time, and as Feffs wasn't exhibiting the "normal" behaviors associated w the disorder, he wasn't considered a candidate for that diagnosis. 

He saw neurologists who put him on meds that only made things worse, went to Boys Town for a fairly inconclusive medical evaluation, and settled into a handicap preschool. 

My parents hoped intensive speech therapy would help, but the school wasn't great about following through on that, and without the autism diagnosis, they didn't have the resources to obtain it in other ways. The school also didn't want to teach him sign language - they postulated that not enough people are familiar with the language, and it would just be frustrating for Feffs to fruitlessly attempt to communicate w the ignorant masses. 

Suffice it to say, many strides have been made for the autism community in the past few decades, but we still have a long, long way to go. 

Please consider contributing to Autism Speaks to help families get the assistance they so desperately need! 

Click here to donate: http://bit.ly/FFCstacieannabelle